You

I don’t know if I should tell you this,

But I think about you a lot.

More then I probably should.

You as in everyone who I have loss.

Midnight thoughts

My eyes water at the idea,

That you’re lost forever.

Not in a way that I’ll never have you back,

But in a way that,

I was maybe your only hope,

For you to be on the right track.

Completly lost to the world,

To what you could or would have been,

Had you simply held on to me a little longer.

Ghost of the past

Constantly between,

Getting enough love,

Or not enough.

It’s scary how quickly it can change.

How you can go from feeling,

Loved by everyone,

And then minutes after,

They become distant with you.

I’m always scared of losing people,

I hate seeing them walk farther away from me,

Because some times,

They don’t come back from their walk.

And I’m still hunted,

By all those who left.

Stains

Do you see all the blood pouring out of my hands as I write to you? Blood stains everywhere I look, reminding me of all the memories of you and I.

 

Leaving

I don’t have it in me,

To tell you to go,

So i’ll tell you to stay.

Please stay.

I’m so terrified of finding out,

What leaving would mean for us.

Nothing

You don’t write anymore,

You keep it all in,

You pretend it doesn’t excist,

That your heart isnt actually breaking,

That you ain’t scared shitless,

Of losing him,

Complex woman

Sharp harsh face,

Thick long lines.

The face of a girl,

A woman with power within.

Big king heart,

Strong fragil thing.

The heart of a girl,

A woman with thousand of emotions.

Thin soft skin,

Long and elastic.

The skin of a girl,

A woman who lives in the shelter it provides for her.

Huge brown eyes,

Opened wide.

The eyes of a girl,

A woman that sees through everything.

Curvy ever changing mouth,

Lips to smile or to pout.

The mouth of a girl,

A woman who brighten the world as she shines her teeth to whoever’s watching.

Beautiful happy being,

Simple yet complex.

The soul of a girl,

A woman who is whole.

Wanderlust

“I want to step towards different places.”

The loneliness of being with you

Tonight i’ll go to bed,

Naked pretending you are here.

I’ll curl up into a ball,

Squeeze my eyes shut,

And imagining your hands,

Slowly raising and falling,

Along my back,

Trying to get me to fall asleep.

I’ll turn around and kiss the emptiness goodnight.

No amount of stuffed animals,

Could ever fill in the gap,

You leave on my bed,

Each time you step out of the house,

To go out into the wild.

It’s crazy because each time you come back,

I know you’ll leave again,

Because that’s what you have to do,

And I’ll never blame you,

But when you come back,

All I can think about is when I’ll lose you again.

Find my way back to writting

I need to find my way back,

To you old friend.

You’re always there for me,

Yet I ignore you everyday now.

I have to take a deep breath,

And spill everything out to you,

So you can comfort me,

As my thoughts come to life,

In the blank sheets of you.

I need to find my pen,

That makes me write again.